Poetic Antic {Page 46}

Amore-ities

You're animosity to me

It burns, it heals, I'm real

I'm here, I feel the breeze

I feel some animosity

In me, inside, it's near

I'm real and you're a hoax

He thinks about animosity

Explicit love he wants from me

I hate to be that girl with you

She's lost herself in animosity

As if she can get in, anyway

I fear she's a little hazy

Poetic Antic {Page 45}

PURIFIED

scribbled my name on a piece of paper

ripped it and torched it

a million burning pieces colored my sky

filling my lungs with bitter smoke

taking my breath away.

Poetic Antic {Page 44}

Marble

I wish I could, someone should

Tell that I'm having the best day

It's very funny how people laugh

When things don't go as planned

Jumbled the keys in my pockets

Lost some money in the process

Paper bills trailing behind me

Hoping my prince would find it

Poetic Antic {Page 43}

New Love

The sun is shining happily

That is nothing new to me

It isn't like this unusually

It makes me smile with glee

I walk briskly in the grass

Feel the summer heat caress

The sun is shining happily

Strawberries ripen with glee

Fluffy clouds in the sky so high

Under the tree tops I lie

A fine day in June not July

Little Romance passed me by

Poetic Antic {Page 42}

One Fine June

I struggled to find a balance

Only asking for help once

Spun around blind-folded

Still I kept my head up high

Through adversity, I've been strong

No room for tears, fears, or weaknesses

It simply isn't suppose to be

That's the truth I have accepted

My heart is cold, my mind strong

I don't let fools change me otherwise

Poetic Antic {Page 41}

~ ~ ~ S p a r k s

The night is young and so are we

There is no need to hurry and worry

No need to stop looking for sparks

Farther and harder we search

I'm gaining back my sanity

Flashing lights color your face

My heart begins to dance

I want to relive this sense of high

Standing still at the edge of a cliff

You place your hand behind my neck

We swayed to the tune of the sparks

Thousand times we did this

Till dawn broke and our knees shook

Still we followed the bidding of the sparks

Keeping up is hard and we are a little tired

We stood still for a moment or two

Grabbed a drink and freshened up a bit

A few candid words later and that's when it hit

I never knew how your eyes brightly lit

Leading me close to your side always

Cupid sent us these sparks of interest.

Poetic Antic {Page 40}

Good Knight

I feel a breeze that's calming

No one looked so charming

Tonight is when I found out

What living life is about

I was not always optimistic

There were times I was ballistic

Always waiting for my dream

Always ending with melted ice cream

"Never give up", is a motivation

Added with tons of invocation

Going with the flow

First rate kind of show

Promises were meant to be kept

What happened? Too inept--overslept?

Walking towards someone better

Maybe I'll write a love letter

Poetic Antic {Page 39}

Transitions

Sneaky little butterflies

Flying high, falling hard

Some things are easy

Others are complex

No time to deliberate

No time to hide that smile

Reasons are made up quick

Excuses are weak

Going through phases

Meeting new faces

Get lost in these mazes

Let's travel with maces

Safety is the key

To feeling free

Follow my wisdom

Life is fantastic

Logical I am not today

No penchant for mind games

Won't let anyone near

Heart too fragile I fear

Poetic Antic {Page 38}

S t r a n g e

Nobody mentioned that I should bring an umbrella with me

I told myself today that outside the sun is shining brightly

I really should have checked to see if it actually did

Because now I'm drenched to the bone

Poetic Antic {Page 37}

Recall

Just finished saying hello

Turned around, then let go

Took my hand, waved goodbye

Didn't need to know why

Shut the door, opened the blinds

Now we are in our right minds

Not knowing what will happen

What we had was misshapen

Ill will, Ill thoughts I have none

Somehow I knew we'd soon be done

Sanity has come back, what luck

Can't help the feeling of being unstuck

Poetic Antic {Page 36}

sleepless . . .

It's like the sun shined and my eyes aren't shut tight

It's as if the sky opened and i'm basking in happiness

I'm thinking about dancing to the beat of my heart

I'm taking a chance, I don't care if people get scared

Fell a few steps back and I'm given a second take

I'm back to the start and I wonder how to do things now

I'm thinking about singing out loud, high above the clouds

I'm taking a chance, i don't care if people do mind

Waking up to a new day, next I'll stay up till dawn

Walking up to a new bay, next time I won't be alone

I'm thinking about letting all my emotions run amok

I'm taking a chance, I don't care if people get hurt

Poetic Antic {Page 35}

Snip

Not a lot of things to do tomorrow

I've been recently let go

Not a lot of things to think through

I've been recently freed

Poetic Antic {Page 34}

Cherish

What I've felt that time was different

It wasn't hard to accept the truth

I didn't feel sad or hurt really

Somehow I knew it wasn't going to last

I wonder how you're coping with this

How long did it take you to decide?

I figured this was easy for you to do

To a point it was kinda ruthless

Funny how auguries work on me

I never know what it's hinting

I never know when things happen

Thank you for letting go

Poetic Antic {Page 33}

I'm Not Missing You

You lingered in my mind too much

And now you're tired of it

You drove me around town a lot

And now you're tired of it

You and I watched movies at night

And now you're tired of it

You and I cuddled in the couch

And now you're tired of it

You said enough and we broke up

And now I'm not missing you

Poetic Antic {Page 32}

Solely

A new day has passed me by

A new way to tie my hair

Wearing my new high heels

Dressed up for tonight

Flaunt a little skin to everyone

Someone wants to get close to me

No one is feeling sorry tonight

Won't be back till it feels right

Don't wonder why or how

Just call up the sun and have fun

Dancing though my clothes are missing

I'm about to show a new me how to be

Poetic Antic {Page 31}

what I've said

somewhere along the way I've learned

it's hard to forget and hard not to care

when people you yearn for are unfair

I keep telling myself not to get burned

I listen to what people say intently

I get hung up on the details too much

I hate hearing bad things and such

They should speak more gently

speaking my mind is not simple

keeping to myself is what I am used to

thus making my company difficult to pursue

people like me because of my dimples

waking up in the morning is tough

unless sunshine seeps in through the blinds

"be thankful you're alive", it reminds

another day to spend putting on my make up

Poetic Antic {Page 30}

With Me

Can't you see? That I am the one

Who makes you smile all the time

When you're mad, sad, or had enough

I've helped you out the best I can

Can't you feel? That I am the one

Who makes you laugh everytime

When you're mad, sad, or had enough

I've liked you ever since day one

How long shall I wait? I'm the one!

Is it really that hard to figure out?

How many hints do you need?

You have a brain use it!

How long will you take? I'm the one!

Is it really that hard to decide?

How much time do you need?

Grow some courage dammit!

Poetic Antic {Page 29}

Staring at the Ceiling

Spending our nights alone

Thinking about the feelings you've shown

It's late already, haven't you known?

Stuck here waiting by the phone.

Thirty-six minutes past eight

Still no sign of you opening the gate

If you're cheating, please tell me straight

There's very little things I can tolerate.

Out late with your friends, you said

They say you're with her instead

Now my mind is full of dread

Happy that you'd spontaneously bled.

Red liquid running down my cheeks

I got my revenge a little after two weeks

Not sorry I ruined those  sentimental antiques

I have to work on my techniques.

Poetic Antic {page 28}

Lost

Funny how I thought I made it clear

How things would be for the two of us

I thought I could handle the pain

Of not being with you every second of the day

I was foolish to think that, now that I recall

I'm all talk and never can walk the walk.

Poetic Antic {Page 27}

Bloody

Left in the cold

Aching to see you

Hear your voice

Feel your skin

Close and gentle

Taste your lips

This time for sure.

Really what happened

I don't know

Some kind of test

This is I guess

I'm very impatient

I hate waiting,but

For you I will try

Where are you?

My mind is strong

My heart is weak

It's significant because

When you turn weird

My mind wanders

And I start imagining

You leaving me

For some other girl

Or some other guy.

I feel so stupid

I feel so angry

I can't do anything

Because you won't 

Even talk to me

I get scared 

I get frusatrated

I make excuses 

You still don't answer

I am miserable.

I say I don't care

I do a lot

I like you, but to me

It seems you don't 

Even see me

I can't take it anymore

Maybe we shouldn't

Have this between us

It was simpler before

You were just someone

I really liked a lot.

I didn't care not at all

Even when you said

Those things to me

But now I know

How you like me too

And I let you know

How I liked you too

Now I fear

That you would change

Take back your words

Hurt me and leave

With only memories.

If these feelings

Of mine somehow

Reach your side

I hope it's enough

To appease your

Resentment to me

I never know

How you really feel

How you get hurt

By me

I apologize 

I misunderstand

Hope it's not too late.

Poetic Antic {Page 26}

... believing

Well it's a happy day

For me anyway

how about you?

I'm asking cause

I don't know

Anything that's happened

To you

What did you do?

I'm curious

I'm bored

Tired of waiting

Tired of caring

Tired of not communicating

With you

Why didn't you?

Call on me?

Caress me?

Today, today, today,

Is tomorrow's yesterday!

I know it's tough

I know it too

That's why I'm trying

To do it like you do.

Poetic Antic {Page 25}

TranceTranceTranceTranceTranceTranceTranceTrance

In like

Not in love

That's our status

Current relationship

All we know

All we want

That's it

Currently

It's enough

Not forever

Just for now

Will we be more?

I don't know how,

But that is something 

We can't deny

So let us try 

Don't be afraid of heights

Poetic Antic {Page 24}

Drafts

I write down words with my pen

I keep it lengthy and vague

I don't divulge much information

Though I transfer on much of my emotions

I'm a little paranoid, I admit

Having been through so much crap lately

It's hard to find someone who is time worthy

Precious thought and memories,

These are the things I like to write about

Little descriptions of my past encoded.

Poetic Antic {Page 23]

Implications

It is building up inside me

The agony of waiting

The reasons are still unclear

I am conflicted

I know what to do

I want to finish it

All I do is procrastinate

It burdens me 

Yet I do it over and again

More so than previously

I enjoy it immensely

I don't want it to end

I resent it

And these words hurt me

How can I be like this?

Speaking indirectly

I should be working

Solving it

Anything, but speak of it

It distracts me from my purpose

And I let control be taken from me

Powerless and broken

I feel it

I crave for it

I know this obssession quite well

Yet all I do is let it

Possess me all the the time

Purposely I let it

I meant for it to

I control it

I am above and beyond

I have power

I have skill

The kind that is beautiful

The kind that is concealed

It's a secret I am willing to share

What can you do against me?

Nothing that I can't do better against you

So don't mess with me

Love me

Poetic Antic {Page 22}

Compilations of Complications

A chronicle of individual poems written with a common emotion over a span of time.

The Other Essay

Yap, yap, yap

All you do is talk

It burns, you spit

I die

Departure time is nearing

Hooray! I get a new feeling

In the afterlife let us not meet

I certainly won't greet!

Yet Another Essay

Hello, again you murderous fool

You sure are not hapless

Enough of your banter

Kill! Kill!

Death that you have escaped

From me

If you won't die

I will! For my sanity

Tomorrow I'll be dead

Today you'll have me killed

Yesterday we weren't happy

Forever we'll be lonely

For I Alone

To take part in this most atrocious practice

And to try to become what is

To be requested and expected of me

I resign my will to you

In that very moment you spoke to me

I was lashed, criticized, and humiliated

Like a person most vile and lowest of low

I was treated like dirt.

The constant disapproval from you

The one thing that brightens your miserable existence

It is disheartening and derrogatory

Wrong in every form.

Poetic Antic {Page 21}

Late

I didn't think this through

The tough times that I brewed

I do believe it's true

My love, it's not you.

Poetic Antic {Page 20}

SHORTSTUCK!

(May 6, 2009--A little before eight o'clock pm)

Three people walking down the road

One fell for the other

Other fell for another

Another fell for one.

They are all going down

Walking around

Trying to hold hands

Unable to and ashamed too

Three people getting lost down the road

All because their hearts don't know where to go

They stopped for a while

Figured things out.

Poetic Antic {Page 19}

Insatiable Friday

 

I need to feel

a little less frustration

I need to feel 

a little more emotion

I don't belong in

a world less my own

I don't belong in

a world with more unknowns

I should be so

incredibly happy

I should be so

undeniably lucky

Poetic Antic {Page 18 Special}

Crazy 18th!

Finding out what you do

Repeating, what's new?

Names in my head

People I know

Occupying my life

Memories captured

Delete, next, next, how cute!

Save

Super delayed response

Did I stutter?

You heard me sing

Passed out in the tub

Emotional drama queen

Cold as ice, sharpened like knives

Be careful,

I'm hot.

I'm a lamb

Easily fooled, very stubborn

A little fluffy on the outside

I'll shave when you shave.

Keep stalling, keeps getting boring

Stuffed cat is orange

My favorite color, but

Purple is my love

Weird? Yes you are.

Not me, you, duh!

I'm suppose to be doing something now

Whatever, this is rare.

The wind blowing my hair

It's cool

Caramel apples, so good

Can I have some more?

I'm a tad bit fruity today

It's a gift

It was my birthday not so long ago

Delicious, that's what it said.

I've been given an offer, but I said no

Because I have it already

I can take care of it

I'll handle it.

Pretty, I've been told

Funny, hell yes!
Like a teddy bear?

Nope, not fat enough

I need to go now

Not far, just downstairs

Grab some new clothes

Take off the old ones

You said something?

I didn't think so

You better not

Spawn!

Too little? Too much?

What am I saying?

I don't know, why do you care?

I'm free.

So much to do, so much to worry about

All I want to do is take my time, enjoy my life

I don't need silly things, though I have many

I'm an egoiste.

Open windows, open doors

Shut it tight

It's not cold anymore

Wrapped.

It's time

So soon?

Almost done

Almost there.

I shouldn't have daydreamed

Shouldn't have said anything

Again, I'm off with my head

Finalmente.

Poetic Antic {Page 18}

May They Be

Come sway with me, take me

To the deep, blue--happy let's be, sea

Baby, don't rush me! 

Save me from regrets

This April so blessed, so divine

An indulgence once 

A memory forever

Undying in my heart, unlike our lives

Poetic Antic {Page 17}

It Isn't So

I see people listening

I hear them giggle

Whispering the unimaginable

What's wrong?

Here I go again

Venturing into depths too deep

But it does not feel silly

I love to swim anyway

How can I not?

Because I know what happens, potentially

It's dark and I can't see

So I sleep and dream and see a shed of light, the glittering hope.

SO what? Enjoy!
You live once, make it last

Make it happy, make it yours

When you have a pole, dance!

I like that, I think

The dancing part and you

Don't say it isn't so

How would you know?

Love me, love me not

I won't die, I will cry

Alone in my room, all in a day

That's my limit, no more, no less.

Poetic Antic {Page 16}

Anticipation

A new revelation

Sparks of admiration

Firsts and flirts

Happy to be loved

Oil on canvas

Cornered with lust

Shadows that dance

Floating around

Do I know you?

I don't know, how about you?

Making out is fun

Driving with my hun

Birds fly and bees sting

Talked about some insane things

I linger on, I hold on

Happy me, how about he?

Satisfaction guaranteed?

No honey for you busy baby!

Stay with me, be with me

Care for me, like me

Too much, it's too much

No more, I can't handle much

Anticipation brings remorse

Just a little, that's enough.

Poetic Antic {Page 15}

SCHIZOPHRENIAC

the sounds are rushing in my sleep
the sounds are fading in your feet
the sounds are washing all there is
the sounds are dying in a leash

LISTEN! LISTEN TO THE SOUNDS
LISTEN! LISTEN TO HOW THEY SWAY
LISTEN! LISTEN TO HOW THEY PRAY
LISTEN! LISTEN TO THE CROWDS

hush? hush? what does it say?
hush? hush? what does it will?
hush? hush? what will it kill?
hush? hush? what will it pay?

SCREAMS! shouts? swear, I WILL
SCREAMS! shouts? solitude, I WANT
SCREAMS! shouts? silence, I WISH FOR
SCREAMS! shouts? serenity, I WISH FOR

Poetic Antic {Page 14}

Paradise Kiss

Are you the one who will make me fly?

Or will you break my wings so I would cry?

I used to like all of your lies

Now you have left, what a surprise!