Poetic Antic {Page 64}

Family

There are cheers and jeers

Shouts, fights, and lies

There are friends and foes

But in the end I have my family

My family keeps me grounded

During weekends and when I am bad

But even though I misunderstand

I know that they love me

I could always turn to them

When I am feeling weak in spirit

But I only need their company

No tricks necessary

Poetic Antic {Page 63}

Awake

These days I keep having the same dream

A dream that's elusive, something distant

No matter how much I want this dream to become reality

It always escapes my grasp, I only see it for an instant

I plan to do my everything, but I keep holding back

I don't know why this is so, why am I so hesitant

The future is something I long for, something I fear

My past is bleak, my present weak, I feel insignificant

Losing interest in life, love, and passion

I wonder when I changed, why am I inconsistent

This is annoying.

Poetic Antic {Page 62}

sparkling

One push and I opened up

One smile and I lose control

One kiss and I began to miss you

One heartbreak and I've had enough

There's really no time for this love

No time for nonsensical things

I'm sure things will be sorted out soon

Leave me alone, let me think for a while

No more bullshit, get away from me

I hate the you that make me so crazy

I despise me for feeling so into you

Somebody slap me back to reality

Poetic Antic {Page 61}

Wrong

I died five times today

Barely hanging on

Things are left undone

I'm doing my best

Put me to the test

Nothing amazing

Stitching up loose seams

No longer searching for the future

No longer living today to die

Everything will be clear soon enough

I lie, I hurt, I cry

I can't sing the song

I was wrong

Forgive me

Fuck it, who cares anyway

I'll forget, gradually

Day by day

Eventually I'll find myself

Right now I'm just putting pieces together

Next time, if we meet

Trust me, I'll be better

So go on with your life

Don't worry about me

I'll find my own way

Sometimes I hurry, but

I'm in no rush at all

Just excited

Smile

Poetic Antic {Page 60}

FIVE

Limited minutes of freedom

I've been over this more than I'm willing to tell

A minute passed by again

The start is a short wait

I have a little bit more to say

I need a little more time to play

But the road to my destination is dark

Better drop things while I still can

It's hard to stop, it never gets done

It's hard to start, it never is fun

It must be done, I tell myself

Even if it's not fun, I have to be quick

Poetic Antic {Page 59}

Wild

I heard the rumors you spread out there

Didn't think you had it in you, I swear

All this time I felt pity for you, I cared

Now I'm tired of your games, I'm spent

There are lots of reasons why I shouldn't stay

There are more reasons that urged me to leave

I really don't know what I should do

I know there's only one solution, I'm scared

I have things to tell you, you might want to listen

Just for a moment won't stop and shut it

Open your eyes, your heart, and your soul

Take a moment, tell me what you see in me

The room keeps quiet, and you are silent

This only means that I have not been accepted

I know this would happen, I felt it and feared it

But there's nothing like experiencing rejection in the flesh

No I'm not in a hurry to leave, though I truly abhor this

I've got nothing to worry over about anymore

I have been freed once more of this wretchedness

I shed no tears for fearful things and frightful monsters

I spread a rumor about your love, my dear

And how you broke my dreams, you see

Lots of times I've done good things

A stain on my record that's a price I'm willing to pay

You see, no one can say that I have not tried

Tried my best, my worst, and my everthing

All for the sake of this opportunity

Sorry you couldn't understand it properly

The world I live in, you live in too

I may not know who I am or what I want to be

But I know what I'm not and what I don't want to be

It's not near, but it's coming to me

This world is big and I'm small compared to it

My voice may be weak, but I speak up for myself just the same

You may not hear, nor care, nor know

Listen up space aliens, I'm back it's my show

Poetic Antic {Page 58}

Talk

What is with all these talk

About giving up

It's easy you say, don't be careless

It's hard to quit if I commit

If giving up is easy

Why do we even try

Why do we hide behind our aspirations

I would have never come here

Poetic Antic {Page 57}

Faster

I have to get moving

I have to get started

I finished some stuff

Still it is not enough

So many reasons in my head

So many urgent whims unattended

Important things get left behind

I'll try to come back

There is never enough time

Not today nor tomorrow

There's always something to be done

Always having no time for fun

I am binded by time passing by

It clinks and makes noise

I love the music it makes

I dance to whatever rhythm it makes

These shackles that bind me

Makes music I dance to

It sparkles in the morning

Blinding me from sanity

Poetic Antic {Page 56}

Just This Time

Reality is hitting me

Everywhere I go it follows me

I did not do anything

Nothing

It is hard to get a grip

When the walls are thick

And the bars are big

And the roads are slippery

It is hard to breathe

I think I might cry, but

I don't, I won't

I'm too fragile

I might break into pieces

I shudder to think I might miss it

This feeling is so shallow

My grip is starting to falter

I want to stop

Stop ignoring my problems

Stop thinking of the future

And do what I have to today.

Poetic Antic {Page 55}

Walls

If I could aim high and reach for my dreams

Why do I still feel trapped and cornered?

Why do I always hold back my screams?

All I want to do is move forward